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Feeling Stuck in a Rut After Your Illinois Divorce? Try These Four Tips

Posted on in Divorce

Arlington heights divorce lawyerEven in the most amicable divorces, the divorce process is not easy and it is normal to feel overwhelmed with emotions when the divorce is over. You may feel grief and relief at the same time, as well as periods when you vacillate between self-doubt and confidence that you made the right decision. Feeling and expressing these feelings is normal and healthy, but sometimes people get stuck in their grief and cannot process it in a healthy way. If you have recently gotten divorced or are considering divorce in Illinois, here are some tips to help you recover from the grieving period. 

What is Divorce Grief? 

People are often ashamed to admit how much grief they feel after a divorce, especially if they initiated the divorce proceedings. But divorce is a tremendous loss in many ways - your identity, your relationship with your children, your community, and even your friends may be lost or dramatically changed. And, of course, your spouse is no longer part of the picture, making the future uncertain. Grief is a natural process that allows us to work through our feelings of loss and move forward into the next stage of our lives, ideally with some room in our hearts for new experiences. 

Tips For Managing Divorce Grief

While grief is a painful experience, it is essential for grappling with loss. It is important not to avoid grief or self-medicate in the hopes that the grief will eventually go away. When you are in the middle of acute grief and need some help managing your feelings, experts have made the following suggestions: 

  • Journal - Keeping track of your experiences in your journal can help you identify feelings, process complex emotions, and feel rooted during a period in which you may otherwise feel very lost. Allow yourself to write freely and without judgment. You never need to read your journal entries again if you do not want to. 

  • Meditate - Sitting and allowing yourself to be immersed in your emotions can be extremely painful but can also allow you to confront them by simply facing them and letting them be. Paying attention to your body and focusing on releasing tension from your body is also helpful. There are many guided meditations available online for free that can help you focus on specific thoughts or parts of your body as you meditate. 

  • Seek help - Some people find therapy helpful while others prefer to talk with close friends. Choose whatever works for you, but try not to isolate yourself. Go on a walk with a friend, meet up with a support group for coffee, or even try going to church. 

  • Explore new meaning - Your life is different now, but that certainly does not mean it needs to be less meaningful. The same things that made it meaningful before - relationships, hobbies, personal development - will help you find a renewed sense of meaning now. 

Speak with an Arlington Heights Divorce Lawyer

Preparing wisely for divorce takes a big chunk of the hassle out of the recovery process. Although the time after divorce presents challenges no matter what, you can get the legal help you need during your divorce from the experienced Cook County divorce attorneys with A. Traub & Associates. We also offer help with post-divorce modifications so you can get all your family law needs met at the same trusted source. Calls us today at 847-749-4182 to schedule a consultation. 




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